How to Overcome Bias and Discrimination as a Woman Engineer: A Personal Reflection

Today, I had a heartfelt coaching session with a young female engineer who reached out for guidance. As we wrapped up, she hesitated, then said she had one last question. We were out of time, but I sensed it was important, so I encouraged her to share.

She asked, "What do you do to deal with biases and discrimination as a woman engineer? Have you ever experienced it?"

I paused—not because I didn’t have an answer, but because her question stirred a wave of memories. Memories of hurtful experiences, of challenges I’ve worked hard to rise above.

Yes, I’ve Experienced It—A Lot

Bias and discrimination have been a reality for me as a woman engineer, and as an Asian minority. In fact, being both a woman and an Asian creates a “double whammy,” meaning I’ve encountered discrimination and biases rooted in both my gender and my race. Each layer adds complexity to the challenges, as stereotypes about women and Asians intersect, sometimes...

Happiness Is the Way: Discovering Joy in the Here and Now

Thich Nhat Hanh once said, "There isn’t a way to happiness. Happiness is the way." It's a simple, profound reminder of the nature of happiness. Every day, we’re flooded with advertisements suggesting that buying something will bring us joy, or that we need to achieve a certain milestone to finally feel fulfilled. Growing up, we’re conditioned to believe that happiness is something to reach for, as if it’s a destination in the distant future. But what if that perspective is upside down? What if, instead of constantly seeking happiness, we realize that happiness is already here, waiting for us to notice?

Last weekend, I took my children to a pumpkin patch. Watching them hunt for the “perfect” pumpkin, laughing and sharing little jokes—it struck me that this is happiness. In these small moments, happiness is alive and tangible, but it’s easy to miss if we’re too busy or distracted by what’s next on our list. This...

Life Lesson from a High School Football Game

Going to our children's high school football games is a special tradition for our family. We're not big football fans, but we rarely miss a game to support our daughter, who proudly sings the national anthem at every home game. Besides, there’s something magical about being there together—the band, the cheering, the music pulsing through the crowd, and sharing those moments in the crisp evening breeze.

Last night’s game was a rollercoaster. Our team was just a few yards away from the end zone, and everyone was on the edge of their seats in anticipation. The atmosphere was electric, a touchdown seemed inevitable. But in a surprising twist, they didn’t make it and opted for a field goal instead—what seemed like a sure three points. But even that went awry as the ball bounced off the goalpost, eliciting a collective gasp of disbelief from the crowd.

From hope to disappointment, and then another round of it, the crowd's enthusiasm visibly waned. I found...

Is Everyone a coach NOW?

Thanh and I were talking about coaching the other day. We commented that it seems like everywhere you turn there is another coaching company. People everywhere are promoting themselves as coaches. What amazes me is that many of those promoting how you and I need them as a coach have never been coached themselves. They see the need for you and me but not them. That seems a little, well more than a little hypocritical, don’t you think?

Thanh and I come at it from a different perspective. We have personally benefited from coaching in years past and both of us are currently being coached. We believe it can help others because we know it’s helped us. So for us it’s not some glitzy advertisement we responded to so we could make big money. It’s a mission to help others help themselves to enjoy a fulfilling life of purpose.

My sister introduced me to coaching more than 10 years ago. I read a book she gave me then set it aside. Sitting in first class next to Marshall...

A Personal Growth Lesson in a Vertigo Episode: Embracing the Unexpected

Not long ago, while on a business trip, I woke up in my hotel room feeling unusually dizzy. Initially, I dismissed it, assuming a bit of rest would make it go away. However, the dizziness only worsened, escalating to a sensation of spinning uncontrollably, as if I were plunging off a cliff. Alone and scared, I eventually called an ambulance. It was one of the most terrifying experiences of my life.

At the hospital, the initial fear was that I had suffered a stroke during sleep. Tests were conducted as neurologists observed my eyes spinning and my inability to recall the date, month, or year. After ruling out a stroke, they concluded that I had experienced a vertigo episode—a condition where displaced crystals in the inner ear create the illusion of falling, leaving you feeling completely out of control.

Reflecting on that episode, I learned some valuable lessons:

Lesson 1: Life Can Change in an Instant.
The night before, I was thriving—learning, working, and confident in...

The Impact of Optimism: Lessons from Helen Keller's Life

Have you ever heard the saying, "Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence"? These words were once spoken by Helen Keller, a truly remarkable soul who overcame incredible odds of being both blind and deaf to achieve greatness.

In 1880, Helen Keller's life took an unexpected turn when she was left both deaf and blind after an illness in her infancy. Yet, she refused to let these challenges define her. With the unwavering support of her devoted teacher, Anne Sullivan, Helen defied all expectations, learning to communicate and even graduating from college. She went on to become the first deaf-blind person to earn a Bachelor of Arts degree.

One of the most incredible moments in her journey happened when she was just 7 years old. Anne led her to a water pump, where she experienced water flowing over one hand while Anne spelled out "water" on her other hand using the manual alphabet. It was in that moment that Helen made...

Navigating Uncertainty: The Power of Pause in Job Transitions

This morning, as I went out for my walk, the rain started pouring down. Memories of my childhood in Vietnam flooded back. As a tropical country, it rains a lot in Vietnam. Back then, rain meant more than just a change in weather; it meant a halt to the bustling city life, where bicycles and motorcycles were the primary mode of transportation. But since moving to the US, I've noticed a stark contrast. Here, cars dominate the roads, and rain fails to disrupt the constant motion of life. It seems everyone is caught up in a relentless pursuit, wearing busyness as a badge of honor.

Ask around, and you'll hear the same refrain: "I've been so busy," or "It's been non-stop." I, too, fell into this trap, equating busyness with self-worth. During one of my meditation retreats, after a nun found me buying a stack of mindfulness books from her bookstore, she told me: “Thanh, stop reading, and start living. Go to the garden and sit. Just be.”

There’s a lesson to be...

30 days to the job you love - Day 23

With 200,000+ tech layoffs in 2023 and more being let go in early 2024, it is easy to get discouraged. Personally, I have many friends who were and are affected. For those whom I worked with, I am grateful that our paths crossed.

For 30 days, I will post a tip each day to encourage you and give you some suggestions on how to stay motivated during your job search.

Day 23

Navigating Tough Times: The Power of Self-Coaching

In the journey of life, we all encounter rough patches, moments where the weight of challenges feels almost unbearable. During these trying times, it's natural to feel disheartened and overwhelmed. Yet, amidst the darkness, there exists a beacon of hope—the ability to self-coach.

Imagine your closest friend confiding in you about their struggles. What would you say to uplift their spirits and reignite their courage? Here are five empowering messages you might share:

You're Not Alone: Remind yourself that you are not isolated in your struggles. Countless...

Strategies for Handling Difficult People at Work

During our careers, regardless of our roles or the companies we work for, we inevitably encounter difficult individuals whom we must navigate. Difficult people at work are individuals who consistently exhibit challenging behaviors that hinder productivity and create a negative work environment. These individuals may display traits such as aggression, stubbornness, or a lack of cooperation, making it difficult for us to effectively collaborate and achieve common goals.

In my experience, dealing with difficult individuals has been challenging, but I have found a few helpful strategies.

First, I go back to my core values, which include love and courage. For example, I once encountered a loud and confrontational customer while working at his house. Initially, I was unsure how to handle his aggressive behavior, but because I have a deep love for my team, I found the courage to confront him, calmly address the situation, and try to defuse it. In that moment, I also reminded myself of...

30 days to the job you love - Day 22

For 30 days, I will post a tip each day to encourage you and give you some suggestions on how to stay motivated during your job search.

Day 22

Expressing thoughts and emotions about job loss can be challenging, especially after experiencing it firsthand. In the past months, I've been focusing on sharing insights about coping with job loss and maintaining a positive outlook. My expertise lies in engineering, leadership and personal development coaching, rather than career counseling. However, the prevalent job losses among my close circle, including myself, have prompted me to delve into this topic. Losing a job, regardless of mental preparedness, can be emotionally devastating, especially when one has invested their heart and soul into their work.

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Yes, I’ve Experienced It—A Lot

Day 23

Day 22

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